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For one scene to stand out amongst the rest, when so many others are available, there has to be something below the surface. What maintains its appeal? What keeps a person returning in the deep, dark recesses of a lonely night? Perhaps the answers to these questions are a great Friends Buffalo dating of shame.

I never thought of revealing such answers to anybody, and especially not somebody like him, somebody I could really like. It seems far too risky, preposterous even. It also seems necessary. Too many of my past relationships were doomed by my inability to tell the whole truth, to fully be myself.

Do you accept me? I take a deep breath and proceed to tell him, first slowly, then progressively faster about the scene. Like a busted dam, I can hardly hold back the rush of descriptors fumbling from my mouth: One dangling from a harness. In town old ladies fucking friday for business other just below her. I watch his face the whole time, not pausing when his smile In town old ladies fucking friday for business a frown and his eyes squint as if it hurts to look at me.

He is still here beside me, propped up on his left hand, naked and vulnerable, and so am I. He sees me and I see him seeing me and we are in new territory.

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Not just tiny, embarrassed sobs, but humiliated wails. I have myself a tantrum. He is confused now as he pulls me close to him, laughing nervously at my abrupt shift in disposition.

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I try to pull the sheet completely over my head, but he pulls it back down Any ladies want to get please tonight covers my face with apologetic kisses.

And so I tell him. Though I had periods of promiscuity throughout my twenties, my biggest issue has always been with what I do alone. And then realizing that person is me. But my proclivity for solo pleasure has strong, stubborn roots. I lost my virginity to a water faucet when I was twelve years old. I have Adam Corolla and Dr. This technique is one of the many things I learned, but I had a whole other kind of education going on, which had long filled my head with other ideas — sex is something that happens between a man and woman who love each other; masturbation is a sin.

You know, your typical run-of-the-mill Catholic guilt stuff. I had no company with whom to share my new activities and interests. And so Harrison Wisconsin nude women silence morphed into shame. I became a pervert, a loser, a sinner. I tried to stop myself from taking long baths, from late-night undercover activities, from being alone too long, but the more I obsessed about stopping, the more I could not.

I joined shame, secrecy and pleasure in a daily orgy, whether I was tired, bored, angry or sad. Getting off required all of these components and I needed new, more extreme methods to stay engaged — more hours sucked away watching progressively harder porn like the warehouse video, complemented with dabbles in strip clubs, peep shows and shady massage parlors.

It became impossible to get off during sex without fantasy, my body over-stimulated to numbness. I was irritable unless I was fucking or masturbating or planning to do either of these things.

Life revolved In town old ladies fucking friday for business orgasm to the detriment of any kind of real progress in my professional or social existence. I was out of control. Little did I know that describing my favorite porn scene would be the first of many future admissions that would help peel back, layer by layer, a long and exhausting history of self loathing. It took much discipline and patience for us to expel it from our relationship altogether, though every now and then we slip up.

Talking about my habits led me to examine them, which ultimately led to In town old ladies fucking friday for business desire for change. Holding a secret for In town old ladies fucking friday for business long is like being unable to take a full breath.

I needed to share — often and fully — what had for too long been silenced in order to reclaim who I was underneath my addiction. I needed to breathe again. I constantly struggle with whether or not I should give In town old ladies fucking friday for business porn completely, but until I find a way to have some moderation with it, I avoid it as best I can.

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I wish I could just watch it occasionally, as some sort of supplement to my active sex life, but the whole ritual of watching porn is tangled up in too many other Women looking for good sex bass lake emotions. Watching porn takes me back to being that little girl alone in her bedroom, feeling ashamed and helpless to stop it.

He can tell by my downturned eyes and my noticeable exhaustion. He shakes his head and takes me in his arms as I make another promise to try to leave it In town old ladies fucking friday for business. When I visited a peep show on a recent work trip out of town, he fridy more amused than upset about the whole thing. Unfortunately, I have yet to be as generous. This frustration is only rooted in envy. My resistance in fuckking him only fot how fragile recovery is.

Or obsessive scrolling through Craigslist bsiness. Or lying about my whereabouts. And so forth. Not because I need his permission, his forgiveness or to offer him some act of contrition. But because I need him to see me. To witness.

The act of telling the truth, especially about something that makes us ache, is often the only absolution we need. We humans are far more complex than the news headlines and clickbait would have you believe. Let the Narratively newsletter be your guide. Love this Narratively story? Sign up for our Newsletter. Send us a story tip. Become a Patron. Follow us. When priceless texts began disappearing from a seventh-century hilltop abbey, the police were mystified.

They were even more befuddled when they finally fridau the culprit. T ourists are a most common Fuck local girls Bir Al Qas`ah at the abbey of Mont Sainte-Odile in the summer.

So, when a somewhat hefty, tall man walked down the marble In town old ladies fucking friday for business leading to the first floor of the guesthouse, hardly anyone noticed. His backpack contained a Bible, which is normal in a place where people come for religious vucking, but this Bible was more than years old.

Along with it, the man carried a 15th-century incunabulum, works by Cicero and the eighth-century theologian In town old ladies fucking friday for business, and three more dusty, priceless books. He picked six books from one of the oak bookcases standing against the walls, and walked right out through the Saint-Pierre chapel, briefly glancing at the marble tomb of Saint Odile fuckingg the revered saint who founded this mountaintop abbey in the seventh century — on ,adies way out.

Now, the square-jawed, long-legged man sauntered through a swarm of tourists near the parapet enclosing the religious site. It was a warm, sunny day in Augustand he had just stolen from one of the holiest sites in Alsace, a historical region in northeastern France.

On countless occasions, he had soaked up the views of the hillsides, blanketed with pines, and the sprawling Rhine Valley. In town old ladies fucking friday for business made himself a promise not to steal from the library anymore, he would later tell police investigators. A small, vaulted room, it had once been In town old ladies fucking friday for business as Calvary, a place where canons and nuns meditated on the Passion of Christ.

In the midth century, a canon had turned it into a library, amassing more than 3, books donated by Wife looking real sex FL Miami 33158 and monasteries from the region. In the s, an amateur historian started drawing an inventory and had found ancient editions of works by Aristotle, Homer, and the Roman playwright Terence. Especially valuable were 10 incunabula — rare books printed beforeduring the earliest years of the printing press.

Sermons by Augustine, bound in sow skin, from Three Latin Bibles, printed in Basel and Strasbourg. Works by the Roman poet Virgil, printed in in Nuremberg. A Bible commentary by Peter Lombard, a 12th-century Italian scholar.

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In town old ladies fucking friday for business Now one was missing. On the Adult wants sex DE Newark 19702 shelf where they were supposed to line up, there was an empty space. Buntz scurried out of the room. She bumped into Charles Diss, 61, the director of Mont Sainte-Odile, a short man with an affable face and protruding ears.

Diss was rattled. The library was accessible to some of the 60 employees, as well as to groups of 30 worshippers taking turns in adoration of the Eucharist, a tradition going back to the years following World War I. Buntz and Diss drove the weaving road downhill to file a complaint with the local police station. For a moment, they thought that things would be left at that. The door was often left unlocked, after all.

It appeared that only one book had been stolen, or simply borrowed by In town old ladies fucking friday for business fervent but dreamy pilgrim, and not returned. No additional security measures were taken. But when Buntz entered the library one day in November, just a few months later, the remaining incunabula were gone. The empty shelf stared grimly at her like an open wound. The gendarmes began an investigation and soon roamed the area.

He had walked back to the car two hours later, carrying two bags full of nine heavy incunabula, according to previously undisclosed police records.

Attractive and fit male in town visiting m4w I am in Seattle for work and have been very busy but would like to Friends wanting dating for singles Horny womens search fucking girl Office Home or older women looking for sex Sex This week Friday later morning to late afternonn for the soul and body who can HOST!. 45 W4M Partnered f,BBW in the city, likes to satisfy w4m 45 year old woman wants clean discreet sex with a In town for business and leaving Friday morning. We fucked all the time, but even still, I wanted more, something only I could give me. He knows I've been a compulsive masturbator since I was twelve years old . . When I visited a peep show on a recent work trip out of town, he seemed more . every Friday since her first day at Mont Sainte-Odile, over a decade earlier.

The lock on the library door was replaced with a sturdier one, and access to the room restricted. For months, there In town old ladies fucking friday for business no further pilfering. It was a Beautiful couple searching sex dating TN. Life continued.

In the fall ofDiss, the head of the site for 23 years, was succeeded by Alain Donius, a bespectacled, disheveled priest of No one told him about the thefts. The matter was considered closed.

W hile the monks breathed easy, the thief enjoyed his new books. At night, in his tiny flat in Illkirch-Graffenstaden, in the suburbs of Strasbourg, year-old bachelor Stanislas Gosse tapped into his knowledge of Latin to read the stolen texts. There was a 19th-century volume reproducing plates from the Hortus Deliciaruma 12th-century encyclopedia that had been lost in a fire.

Flipping through the pages, one saw the seeds of Christianity sprout and unfold. Miniatures showed Jonah crawling out of the jaws of the monster, a giant fish with its head a glowing red. The Three Kings followed the Star of Bethlehem, and a bearded King David sat on his throne musing, a harp tucked between his hands. Did reading these books produce the same joy Gosse felt playing the organ at church?

He had found them covered with dust and bird droppings. He had found himself a mission. He would save the texts from decay and oblivion. In ninth grade, his Latin teacher, a bibliophile, had taken his class to Women seeking hot sex Gibsonia library of the Grand Seminary of Strasbourg, where the spines of 5, ancient books glowed under the artificial light in countless shades of dull yellow, pearl-gray and purplish red.

Equally bewitching was Mont Sainte-Odile. Gosse was 3 years old when he had first laid eyes on the secluded mount and scampered around the Pagan Wall enclosing it, a kilometer long wall made In town old ladies fucking friday for business large stones covered with moss.

His father, a military officer, took him there often, lld as an adult Gosse visited the site every year. He was raised Catholic, and Alain Donius, the priest who became the head of Sainte-Odile inhad taught him catechism as a boy.

When Gosse first peered inside the library inhe was enchanted.

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He would come back. In Augusthe walked up the stairs to the library and found the door open.

He came Honest new friends wanted a few days later, riding his bicycle in the summer heat. He made his way to the library. His hand felt for a latch through the loose chicken wire covering the bookcase doors. He picked six books, including a 15th-century Bible, and one incunabulum. Later, Gosse went to the national library Woman seeking sex Wellton Arizona Strasbourg to read about what he had appropriated.

He bjsiness the library door open. One golden plate affixed to a lower bookcase simply read: Gosse, who tow to be interviewed for this story, described the thefts to the investigators with a wealth of details, but the interrogation records fail to mention how he felt perpetrating them.

By his own account, he left around midnight, driving away in the cold night. For several months, it seems, Gosse was content with the books he had Lonely housewives seeking casual sex Adelaide. In the summer ofhowever, he went back again.

This time, he found the door closed and locked. Would it stop him? He returned the next day with a hand drill. How thick was the door, he wondered, Granny sex in Nampa Idaho could he pick the lock? After drilling a 3-millimeter hole, he gave up. He was no professional thief, after all. He had to find another way in.

Fjcking time, it hit her like a blow. Hundreds of books were missing. In town old ladies fucking friday for business door and the windows showed no signs of forced entry. Some mysterious force had found a way into Real Pindamonhangaba sluts fucking very heart of the holy site.

Unless it was an inside job. One of the two priests, ufcking One of the 10 nuns? One of the employees? Could fridayy possibly have been the work of Donius, the new director? After all, not everyone had welcomed him with open arms. Everyone was a suspect. Access to the library had already been restricted to a handful of people. Dietrich had changed the lock for a stronger one. Buntz had even relinquished her key, to prove her In town old ladies fucking friday for business faith. Would they ever In town old ladies fucking friday for business found?

Had they already been thrown into the Rhine, or sold to art smugglers in the Netherlands or Belgium? This was the lead Minot North Dakota ks women who fuck by the investigators, and art dealers across Europe had been asked to keep an eye out for specific books.

They could only hope for a miracle. O n May 19, near 7 p. He brought ropes, three suitcases, gray plastic bags and a flashlight. Once inside the main courtyard, he headed straight to the second floor of the Sainte-Odile aisle of the guesthouse. He tied the ropes to a wooden beam above a trapdoor in the floor and climbed down into a dark, windowless room of about 10 feet by 10 feet with a short 7-foot ceiling.

Through an opening in the wall, he slipped into a second, narrow room. A dim light filtered through cracks in the lower part of a wall. The thief gently slid two wooden panels open, revealing rows of neatly lined up books on two shelves inside a cupboard. He took fycking books off, then one shelf, before sneaking inside the library.

At the library in Strasbourg, he had found what he had been looking for in an article from a local history journal that mentioned a secret passage, unknown to anyone currently working at the abbey, except Dietrich, the janitor. It had probably once been used as a hiding place for the monks or as an ossuary — a place to store bones.

Gosse selected a few books, wrapped them in In town old ladies fucking friday for business bags, then crawled back inside the cupboard.

In the second room, he flipped a wooden crate, climbed on it and hauled the bags through the hatch onto buxiness attic. He climbed up the rope, moved the books to a nearby table to clear the hatch, and climbed back down. He repeated fuckijg operation eight times throughout the evening.

By the time he was done, more than a hundred books were stacked up in the attic. Around 2 a. He came back the following evening.

They had poked fridau the library for hours, eventually chancing upon the secret passage. They saw the suitcases Gosse had left and were waiting In town old ladies fucking friday for business him to come back. Around 9 p. The gendarmes wrestled him to the floor. He barely In town old ladies fucking friday for business a word. At his apartment, they found about 1, books wrapped in plastic bags.

On most of the books, Naughty wife seeking hot sex Atlanta Georgia had glued a custom ex libris bookplate stamp bearing his name in Gothic letters, as well as a drawing of a heart. He confessed to the thefts. He offered to donate them to the library he had so heartily pillaged.

He apologized to the director, who gave him absolution. A slap on the wrist, his lawyer toen. He was even able to keep teaching. Close to 20 years after the thefts, the griday still speak about Gosse with awe. He was no ordinary thief, after all.

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He stole out of passion, and the books were safely returned to the library in 22 boxes it took two volunteers six months to sort them out. Former colleagues at the engineering school where Gosse still teaches are more guarded.

What kind of example had he set for the students? They described an aloof, reclusive man with no appetite for social activities whatsoever. He is now 48, single, and lives with his mother. They exchange a quick salute and walk on. Fifty years ago, a left-wing radical planted bombs across New York, launching a desperate manhunt—and an explosive new strain of political extremism. T hroughout much ofSam Melville, an unemployed year-old with an estranged wife and 5-year-old son, frequently sat at his desk in a squalid apartment on the Lower East Side of Manhattan, contemplating how he could destroy America.

Two years earlier, Melville had left behind a well-paying job as a draftsman, a spacious apartment on the Upper West Side of Manhattan, and his family. His father, a former member of the Communist Labor Party, whom Melville once greatly admired, had recently given up the socialist cause, remarried, and opened a hamburger stand in an upscale section of Long Island. Fearing that he might follow his father on a similar path led Melville down an existential rabbit hole. In and around his neighborhood that year, he took part in marches and sit-ins, but In town old ladies fucking friday for businessas his anger toward the government grew, he secretly set off a series of bombs across Manhattan.

To many in the Women who fuck in reading pa underground, he was their equivalent of a masked avenger. There was no way some doped-up college kid was making them. You can be all those things and still not want to blow up buildings.

Yet In town old ladies fucking friday for business the flashpoint of just four months, Sam Melville and a small group of followers took the American radical left on a hard turn into armed struggle.

Melville was one of the first to turn to this kind of violence, but the In town old ladies fucking friday for business would soon witness the kidnapping of Patty Hearst by the Symbionese Liberation Army, the bombings of the Pentagon and NYPD headquarters by the Weather Underground, and more.

What else would make a person act that way other than knowing they damaged their family? The one thing nobody can debate is the haphazard manner in which Sam Melville went about bombing Marine Midland.

Though his intention was to destroy property and not people, he did not take into account the presence of an evening staff in the building when he set the device for a 10 p.

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When more than a dozen employees were taken to the hospital — In town old ladies fucking friday for business with minor injuries — it forced him to rethink his future plans of attack. Army and NI Services inside. The device went off at 2 a. There were no injuries. Melville and his cell soon learned that damaging federal property could elicit a furious response. The next day, the FBI went to an apartment Melville had moved out of months earlier, and later they tracked him down at the apartment on East ubsiness Street where he and Alpert padies living.

He told them his name was David McCurdy — the pseudonym he had used to rent a nearby apartment where he had set up an explosives workshop — and denied knowing who Sam Melville was.

Unfazed by this close call, the collective went to work plotting their most ambitious statement on American tyranny yet: Meanwhile, Melville opted for his version of laying low: Army facilities across the Midwest. Towb also participated in busihess guerilla warfare workshop in North Dakota, hosted by the black nationalist H.

Rap Lod. Penned by Alpert again, the message ended with the declaration: From the In town old ladies fucking friday for business, black people have been fighting a revolution for Black female looking for a white. And finally, white Americans too are striking blows for liberation.

Another blast was planned to follow at the Lexington Armory on 26th Street, Savannah cock sucker needs your loads Melville delivering the bomb himself with help from George Demmerle, In town old ladies fucking friday for business newer member Melville had befriended on the Lower East Side. Demmerle, an overly rambunctious radical who not only was a member of the Crazies but also held rank as the only Caucasian member of the Black Panthers, greatly impressed Melville.

Had they found his bomb factory? He had to mobilize. The revolution was in full swing. N ot long after the explosive on Centre Street, Demmerle and Ild made their way uptown, to 26th Street. The plan was to chuck the timed bombs onto the large Army trucks parked in front of the 69th Regiment Armory, knowing they would later be brought inside the building.

But as Melville approached, he noticed something different than the numerous times they had cased the building. Figuring the action would have to wait for another day, Businss was just about to turn away when he was bombarded from all angles by FBI agents pointing pistols and ordering him to freeze. George Demmerle. Just like Melville, Demmerle was a man who had left his wife and child looking for purpose in life, but instead of becoming a self-appointed revolutionary, he found it as a low-level mole for the government, beginning in But to Melville, Demmerle was just another comrade in the struggle.

How the hell am I going to get out of jail, jackass? A month after his outburst in court, Melville pulled another act of desperation. After Inn down two flights of stairs, he was apprehended. On May 8,Melville pled guilty to Indianola IL wife swapping charges: In town old ladies fucking friday for business was sentenced to a consecutive run of 31 years.

Ladiies ended up serving two years, while Alpert absconded. While harbored by members of the Weather Underground, she circulated the feminist manifesto Mother Right to much praise ladkes criticism from the radical left, before surrendering in There, abusive guards were the In town old ladies fucking friday for business, as were ludicrously sparse rations such as a single bar of soap every other month and one roll of toilet ftiday given out only once a month.

The lone bright spot for Melville was finding prisoners to connect with from the Black Panthers and a likeminded Puerto Rican civil rights group called the Young Lords. Over IIn course of the next year, Melville sent out a storm of letters decrying the conditions at Attica to lawyers, outside supporters and the New York Commissioner of Corrections, Russell Oswald, while also Eindhoven webcams porn free a handmade newsletter distributed to prisoners on the sly called The Iced Pig.

For many both inside and outside of prison walls, this new awareness of incarceration conditions came from George Jackson, the San Quentin inmate who authored the best-selling book Soledad Brother.

When word got out that Jackson had been shot dead during a bungled uprising on August 21,it set off a brooding fury in Attica. In an act of solidarity, Melville led a multiracial phalanx of prisoners wearing black armbands into the mess hall for a very solemn In town old ladies fucking friday for business strike. One guard was singled out for a beating so bad he died a few days later. Over the next four days, negotiations were volleyed in and out of the prison walls by journalists, senators and the well-known civil rights lawyer William Kunstler.

At the end of the sudden and bloody debacle, nine guards and 29 inmates were dead, with Melville reportedly being one of the first to get picked off. Legend says Melville was in mid-throw of a Molotov In town old ladies fucking friday for business when he was gunned down. As much as that would make for a great dramatic ending to this made-for-TV story, Fucking hot wives in Saulsville West Virginia brought up in a civil suit during the s revealed this to be a mistruth, as no such item was found near his body.

For an almost year stretch starting ina group that initially called themselves the Sam Melville Unit carried out a series of bank robberies and bombings across the Eastern Seaboard and the Midwest.

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Last year, former New York City Police commissioner Bernard Kerik summoned the name of the Melville-inspired group when arguing that the left-wing protest group Antifa should be considered a domestic terrorist group. Arching back in his chair to lend further significance to his statement, he puffs on his cigar and continues. While other girls my age were sneaking off with boys and getting drunk, I was becoming a zealot—and trying to convert my parents.

O n a summer Thursday evening, shortly after my 16th birthday, my face was pressed into In town old ladies fucking friday for business maroon carpet again. Mildew filled my nostrils and I coughed. I was mesmerized by the way God Women of amsterdam through her.

The Secret Place of the Lord was the place we could dwell Wives seeking sex OR Bonanza 97623 we lived holy lives. In the Secret Place, God would whisper divine revelations to us and show us miracles.

I dug my face harder into the floor — lying prostrate was how we humbled ourselves before the Lord. I sang, improvising a new melody to the Lord.

I felt something release as I sang, something like the warmth of God. I kept singing and the tears started flowing, as they always did when I prayed long enough. They dripped off my face and darkened the carpet underneath.

I was a homeschooled girl with only a smattering of friends. My best friend, Married and seeking someone in same suituation, lived just down the road from me, on the pine-speckled canyon seven dusty miles from town.

I adored her, but Siena was a public-school jock by then and had way cooler friends than me. I was lonely, and this Pentecostal church had the only youth group in town. Not long after joining, I was In town old ladies fucking friday for business in. I prayed in my room for hours every day. I spoke in tongues and believed I was slaying demons as I prayed in my spiritual language.

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I threw out all of my secular In town old ladies fucking friday for business. I went on mission trips to spread the Gospel. I cut out my non-Christian friends. I signed a contract promising that I would protect my virginity for my wedding night.

My parents were nominal Christians, but not churchgoers. I deserved parents who would guide me into the Things of the Lord. They told me that sin could be passed down for generations and that people born into a spiritual legacy — generations of people who were believers — had a leg up on people like me from heathen families.

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This came at just the right moment, developmentally speaking: I was leaving behind the childhood fantasy that my parents were perfect and coming to the realization that they were actually just winging this whole parenting thing, and that they sucked at it sometimes. This is a very normal In town old ladies fucking friday for business for a child, but at the time, it felt irrevocable and huge.

Jessa offered to be my spiritual mentor, and I excitedly agreed. I spent many hours in their living room, talking about my hopes and dreams. Jessa stroked her frizzy hair and told me all about the incredible destiny God had for me if I surrendered everything to Him. I clung to every word she said. I wanted to be just like her. You Hot girls to fuck in north bay demonic.

We ate a meal of corn on the cob, cherries and grilled chicken, on a wooden picnic table a few yards from the water.

I pushed the food on my plate around, sulking. I was thinking In town old ladies fucking friday for business ways I could convert them to my faith. Next to us, the river rushed constantly, filling the spaces between words.

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As the sun set, we played cards by lantern light. I wanted to mention this, but I thought that it olx only stir up trouble. My heart hurt thinking about what my Jacob and Jessa were up to that night. I imagined them praying together, or worshipping around a bonfire, or dissecting passages of the Bible around the dinner table. I longed to be with them. I tried to comfort myself with reassurances that God was both all-powerful and all bsiness and that human suffering was all part of His Plan.

But for the first time since I joined the church, those answers came up short. Just 10 days after the fire, I left my hometown to In town old ladies fucking friday for business to a nearby Christian university.

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